Just Down

I'm down...
down for what?

My bf said that I not trust him
Keep think have many girl around him
will steal him away from me

I was always think too much
afraid that a lot of bad girl will steal him away from me

I know I always keep to ask him who beside you, who stay with you
I know he dislike
even myself
I know he feel I was very very annoying...

He want me to trust him
to not to worry or think too much

I wish I can do it
but I know I can't

Cuz I was very afraid
I know I can't do it....
But I have to do so

I know it is a better way to keep a relationship stay longer
But I know I will fail...
fail to do so...

So I have to force myself to not ask more to not care more
To not Worry it...

It is very suffer to do so...
But I must Force myself to do so

I know started I will very suffer to not ask more to not care
but it is a period...
when it is pass all will be fine

I have to believe I can do so

I just can tell myself,
Even as more as the girl beside you, wanna close with you
I also don't care,
they died is their problem
non of my business

I don't know why,
I feel Like girl who want close with my bf
who want to know him all is evil
all is vixen

I know I'm Weird,
I know I'm very terrible
I know I was Lost control
because I was saying something very terrible and bad word

I'm sorry
I just Have to control myself more.
Just that

I was downing sometime
because he asking me to do something that I can't do it well

Just don't want to disappointed anyone even myself

Yeah, I just can force myself to do anything that I have to I should to do so

I'm just so suck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

More Picture to Upload - As My promise

As What I have Promise~~
Here is my photoshooting day Picture
Cuz too many so I pick some really look nicer to uplaod here
and share with you all
Picture at below is my personal Picture
it is just taking alone for me ^^
So ENJOY~~








Of course, other than my personal Picture
still have picture that taking for 3 person
it is hard to take it but the result is quite ok
so picture at below is sharing with you all
Enjoy it~~

Amilk,Jessica and Me(lotus)

Picture at below,
It is a picture that taking for me and amilk only
it is a taking as studio picture and with COOL style



Hope You all enjoy it and like it
and below is the last picture to share with you all


I quite Like this picture in personally
because it seem so happy
So Stay happy as the picture
in your life ^^

Studio Photo

Who is this gal?
She is Lotus!!
Me!! haha

Did I be a Model Already?
Of course~~~
Not...

I Just take a Photoshooting Again
in studio??
of course~~
Not!!

Than Where I take?
hehe , it is a secret~~
anyway...I Love the photoshooting in this time

Because I already Can Do it well than 1st time
and the out come in this picture was so Pretty

The picture at below
Look Like Magazine Cover Page Feel
I Love the picture Much



This Two Picture is My favourite now
because ~~
I Havent get the rest of picture yet

so I'm Be patient to wait for it ^^

Another day of Photoshooting with Amlik and Jess

It is a relax day
went out to shopping?
not!! we are went out for a photoshooting


it is not easy to do 3 person photoshoot
but the picture have show it nicer
and with a story life...

ok, let's show you a few picture
it is a little part in the photoshoot







Still have more...but it is a little bit I get From My Photographer ^6^
so Just Show You this little bit
anyway wait I get all I will Show up More at here again ^^

我小孩子

一点小事都看不开
小小事就闹
小小事就哭
小小事就生气

每次只会钻牛角尖
别人给意见，我都不接受
我都推翻

我，幼子，
想法，态度都一样。。。

小孩子
长不大。。。

我越来越不想这样
我开始想封闭自己

我选择少说，少给意见
少发表。。。
多听，多接受。。。

这是全新的我。

我得到了我要的薪水
我下一步是帮牙
然后。。。就是upgrade自己
车，我知道我一定不会得到了

我家人不打算出车给我。。。

昨天。。。我很难过
我哭了很久。。。
我男友说我。。。我不听
他安慰我，我不听。。。
所以，我让他伤心
我让所有人讨厌我。。。
我很令人讨厌。。。

要求多多。。。
不懂得知足。。。

贪心的我。。。
我要改变。。。

我很幼子

难过伤心，
我哭了。。。
哭到眼都肿肿的。。。

我很惹人讨厌。。。
我。。。

不想多说话。。。

我选择了面对？
不知道。。。

我不想再多说些什么。。。
我都是错的。。。
做什么，说什么。。。
都是错。。。

态度，想法，都是错
都是幼子。。。

我很幼子。。。
不懂得长大。。。

没用的东西。。。
我真没用

我很假

我，只会怨天怨地。。。
每次遇到不好的事时，
我都很悲观
我都只会怨天怨地怨身边的人，家人。。。

我很没用
我很假
我一点也不理智
我一点也不懂得体谅
我一点也不明白事理
我一点也不懂得什么叫做爱
我根本不接受别人给我的话

我总是有很多的理由去推翻
我总是给自己很多的借口
我总是逃避问题

我就不能勇敢点面对一切吗？
我都那么的假吗？

我。。。就不能改掉我的坏习惯吗？
我的态度不好。。。
我知道。。。

是我不要改还是我做不到？？

我真的很差劲。。。